In other articles I have talked about gossip and casting suspicion on your character. This article is similar in some aspects. Although, it is not any less of a hurtful situation than what gossip and casting suspicion delivers. It still changes other’s opinion of you. Then their behavior changes in your relationship with them.
*Second-hand offense = There are three or more people in a situation. If the first person says something negative about a third person to a second person and it causes the second person to get offended against the third person on behalf of the first person; this is a second-hand offense. (Wow – that is a mouth full!)
Initially the issue is the first person’s problem and it should stay that way. Just like gossip, the second person can’t go to the third person to find out if the offense is true. Besides, what does one do with a second-hand offense? Who apologizes and to whom and about what, especially if it is to be a secret? The second-hand offense does not belong to the second person. The second person doesn’t have a right to do anything about the situation. So, the second person is just upset on behalf of the first person and can’t get rid of the offense and can never arrive at the truth.
If you are in this situation as first, second or third person it would be good to deal with what you are going through. Wouldn’t it? Give me a call.